Ben, he told us already about his decision I guess " ... I said that I am not against and that this topic is in my head these several weeks…", maybe you missed something dude? I think that now these guys just thinking - when to start all over again))) Andi think that they don't have any doubts about it, because somewhere deep inside they knew the answer from the beginning!
You know I have always been dreaming about big and real family. I am sure that a normal family should have at least two babies. So I am not against the second child. That joke was sudden and I began to think about things I have never thought about. I know that a child in the family is a great responsibility. I know it for sure. I want my children to be happy and I want my partner to be happy with me too. If I say “no” I will break his heart and I will show that his desires and wishes are not important for me….and this is not true… I can’t say that I am not ready for the second child. Everything happens suddenly and this frightens much. And that is all.
Kevin - i see. but think about the fact - that this was a surprise for you - and as soon as you knew about this - you were not sure if this surprise is a pleasant one or no. It does happen often this way. You do have a point of view on some question - and you pretty well suspect how would you react on certain thing, if it would happen in your life. But when it does happen eventually - you are caught by surprise - and you not know how to react. If you would genuinely think that you would not mind of the second kid - you would not hesitate with the answer - even if that would be just a joke from your partner. But you seem to be embarrassed.. So I suggest you to think it al over once again.
Why should I think over it again???? You know we live the life and never think about many things that can somehow change our lives for the better!!!! I haven’t thought about the second child for some reasons. I don’t know these reasons if to be true. I don’t know why. I want to be happy. I want my partner to be happy with me. I want to have a happy family that will overcome any difficulties together. So why should I hesitate. Yes maybe I surprised great. It was unexpectedly and that is all. It doesn't mean I am against and it is worth to say "no" to my beloved man. i want to be happy.
Hush, it's all right) i was just trying to make the conclusions basing on the information that I had) If I am wrong - that is not a big deal, it is hard to determine the real emotions of the person when you only read the plain text and have no idea how does this person speaking these words, when you do not see the situation with your own eyes) If all that you are saying is really so - then i am really glad about both of you guys - and I hope that soon you are going to start the surrogacy program again... Or will you choose the adoption? Did you discussed this seriously already - or you still do not know if that was a joke or serious announcement?:)
Yes, Kevin, you are right, I see that we helped you already, and you know the answer. Yes, big and happy family sounds great. I also want to have it. What else can be better in this life? Better that happy faces of our close and loved people? ) Hope to hear soon about your second child)
We are for the surrogate motherhood with both our pair of hands. We are against adoption….when you adopt a child of course you do a good thing….you help the child to receive a happy family….blalabalabalalalblabla…but if to think more…if to take all reasons for and against? You never know what person you are going to adopt! You never know who were his real parents and what consequences this can have…maybe his real parents were drug addicted? Or they sat in prison for killing the person….and you future child can inherit these traits…he will be a murder…or drug addict? I am afraid to do this really…yes your biological child can inherit something from your dad or grandfather but…at least you know what to expect!
Kevin, I am glad that you finally decided everything, and also glad that you share with us all important events in your life, and don't dissapear as other guys... Concerning your thoughts about adoption - why do you have so many negative thoughts about such children? Prison, killer and so on. AHAHAH. Every time when I hear about adoption from guys on such forums, practically all of them think and tell the same, that all these children - future killers) Guys, why don't you have positive thoughts? Maybe such child would be famous painter or singer?
You're right! Or maybe the child will be both singer, potential killer and the drug addicted - like Chuck Berry, for example? Would it not be the honour to raise the person like that?:) the thing is that we still do not know what does play the first part in the forming of the child's character - his genetics - or the way you raise him. Yes, I know that it is perhaps the balance and mix of these two - but in the end you do not know if this gun is going to shoot, if you know what I mean) If I would have no other options - i would adopt the kid, that is for sure) And I would not really care about his genetic heritage and about who were his parents.. i am sure I would be able to raise a worthy person.
Ben, you know, when I read today your answer I remembered a film, that I saw yesterday, about some boogieman, don't remember the exact title to tell the truth. But the thing is that the main hero - at the beginning - a small boy, who killed anymals and practically the whole family, and at the end - a huge guy, who continued killing. Guys, after your words about adoption, and our part in it, sometimes it looks so funny that i think about such films. For some guys it is like catastrophe... They are children, who just need your love and care, thats all!
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