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Luck
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

I have meet a guy who is afraid of straight men. It was surprise for me because I have never met such people before. He has experience of homophobic attitude from straight guys and it seems like he is still afraid. He is good guy, very kind and handsome. He lived in the country were it was forbidden to be a guy and now it is difficult for him to open even in the company of gay guys. I want to help him but I don't know how. i don't want to hurt him and don't know how to act in the right way.

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Dodge
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

I don't have such friends and don't know such people but it is real problem of our time. There are a lot of gay guy who lived in countries where people were killed for having not traditional sexual orientation. mostly it is arabic countries and some in Africa. It make a big moral trauma for those who are under the pressure in such places and even when they are in the country where everything is ok the still feel themselves not safe. just show him that he is safe... it will take some time, i think.

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1033

Man
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

Agree that there is no need to hurry him up because he needs time to realize and understand, to accept the fact that he is in safe country with the same people. But i should say that people with homophobic moods are everywhere, like nationalists which also are everywhere. But of course, in EU countries we have less of such incidents. I recommend you not to tell your common friends about it. Let all of them accept each other as they are.

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991

Shadow Man
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

i understand that you want to help him somehow but as for me the best your contribution into his recovery is not to mention this facts and not to discuss them. When you discuss it all the time you don't give him ability to forget everything, you all the time concentrate him on this recollections. Just let him to forget everything which had happened with him there. I am sure that in couples of years it will be opened topic for discussion but now it is to early.

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998

Mark
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 07/19/2016 - 10:59
Afraid of straight men

I have such friend on my FB account. We have never meet in real life and I don't talk with him personally. We just write messages to each other sometimes. And he told me that it is very difficult morally to live in place where you are out of the legislation. He told me that he always has a feeling that he will be caught and murdered. I can't even imagine how it is possible to live in such places and not to go crazy.

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Steve
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

That is why they move to other countries where it is safe. I think that those who were under such moral pressure from the government or other authorities that it will be good to visit psychologist and to tell everything. To my mind it is not good to keep everything inside. You leave him one by one with his fear and not solved moral problems. It is dangerous. People who were in such situations need professional help.

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993

Travis
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

It is rather disputable question what it is needed to do and what it is better to do. Both sides are right as for me. Maybe everything depends on the person. Someone is stronger and someone is weaker, I mean in moral aspect. Someone can to cope with everything by himself and someone really needs professional help. I dont want to say that they are crazy but psychologist just can help to balance moral condition of the person which can prevent unpleasant consequences in future.

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1011

Mario
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/28/2016 - 09:10
Afraid of straight men

Yes I know cases when gay men are so afraid of opening their real face on public because they were abused earlier in life. Of course there are people that can even kill you if you are a gay. I think that he was lucky to move from that country. If you are punished because you are agy it doesn’t mean you should refuse from being who you are.

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1133

John
Last seen: Never ago
Joined: 09/02/2016 - 00:11
Afraid of straight men

It is a pity to hear such story. Personally I didn’t face with such a problem. I have never met people who are so cruel to gays. But I know they exist and they abuse and kill many gays each year. I am also afraid to open the fact that I am gay to all people that’s why only close people, relatives and friends know my little secret.

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856

Valeos's picture
Valeos
Last seen: 3 months 3 weeks ago
Joined: 11/23/2017 - 11:52
Afraid of straight men

Greetings dear friends. Yeah, tired of these homophobes, do not allow to live normally to such guys as your friend for example! I have no such problem, not every guy wants to offend the champion of MMA, and I have a growth of 194 cm. Nobody has yet tried to attack me, but I do not think that your friend is as physically prepared as I am, so it's difficult for me something advise him. Keep it up all the time, but it seems to me that it takes time, a little to forget, and then maybe he will not be so afraid of straight guys

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Alister
Last seen: 1 month 1 day ago
Joined: 03/15/2018 - 06:54
If you look at the severity

If you look at the severity of the wider, not only as the education of children, then a strict person can become if he wishes other people good and happiness. However, this is not enough. I did not make a reservation on the account of mutual love. You can not punish people who are indifferent to you. For example, while subordinates will not have respect and sympathy for the boss, until his location is valuable to them, and the distance from him is unpleasant, until then, any form of punishment will be perceived by them not as rigor, but as tyranny. Punishment without mutual sympathy undermines the authority of the leader and shows that he does not understand what is happening.

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